There's an exchange in the film "The Devil Wears Prada" where Anne Hathaway's character is employed in this ridiculously demanding job at a high-end fashion magazine office where most, if not all, of the employees are required to dress the part of a high-end fashion magazine employee. No casual Friday's here folks unless casual means a pair of thigh high Chanel boots or a Prada ballcap or Jimmy Choo sneakers if there was such an item. Anyway, I digress... The exchange was between the Andy, played by Hathaway, an up and coming fashion magazine assistant and Nigel, played by Stanley Tucci, a dedicated and jaded Associate Editor who seems to grasp the subtleties and significance of a high-end fashion magazine in the life of whoever reads that kind of stuff.
At a photo shoot in Central Park, Andy approaches Nigel and casually comments on how her personal life is hanging by a thread because of the demands of this job that she really doesn't care for. Nigel's reply was somewhere along the lines of: "Let me know when your personal life is in the tank. It may be time for a promotion." So at 4:00 am on the morning of my departure for my high school reunion, I find myself unable to sleep not because of the excitement of my upcoming trip, but because of the job... err, I mean office work that I'm going to leave behind.
Time and time again, I've alluded to how demanding my chosen field is. I work in the real estate and mortgage industry and the hours are long, the clients difficult, the bosses slash sales reps egomaniacal and most everyone is involved in the unashamed pursuit of making money. In it's heyday, starting in 1999, the industry has sort of fueled the nation's economy. Property values skyrocketed and people took advantage of their accumulated equities to spend, spend, spend on anything and everything they can get their hands on. It stimulated the economy, increased production and strengthened all things economic in our nation.
As property values leveled, creative individuals found ways of maximizing equity even to the undeserved (bad debtors) and the unqualified (low-income). And after engaging in long complicated processes of cheating, dare I say defrauding, lenders the industry is now taking a nose dive. Home Foreclosures are up, lay-offs by the thousands are a monthly occurence, brokers are going out of business daily, agents are taking jobs at Target or Walmart, people are skipping on mortgage payments and sadly, many have just completely walked out on their mortgages. And were not talking about just the middle class, there are those highly publicized individuals who've abandoned their million dollar homes too. Oh and did I mention that indictments are a-flying because of how "creative" some people have become?
Here's my point, everyone is feeling the pinch. Six figure salaries have now been reduced to four. Mercedes Benz and BMW's have now been replaced with Prius and Toyotas, and everyone is on edge and out for themselves. It's more demanding than it used to be. Clients are meaner and greedier because there isn't much to go around anymore. There's more backstabbing among those who are still employed and more jockeying for whatever positions that are left that everyday is a day full of machinations and manipulations that one would think Machiavelli himself was orchestrating all of it in one fell swoop. This is Darwin's theory at its best. Gone is the love and joy for the work before us. It has now been reduced to the survival of the fittest or at this point, the survival of the most politically correct, backstabbing, suck-up money can buy.
And just like Andy's character, on top of all this, my personal life is hanging by a thread to boot. So at a little after 4:00 am, on the morning of my departure for a 2 week trip, I find myself up and about thinking that maybe it's time for that demotion. I certainly don't want to get to the point where my personal life is "in the tank." Though I admit to having fears of financial hardship when I take that plunge into something new and more sane. And then this thought, nay this reassurrance, as in all things I ought to trust in God to provide and deliver us from this hardship. After all, He is the Great Provider and, if nothing else, whatever He brings together, let no man put asunder.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
"But I Want You To Demand Of Me"
I was coming out of difficult circumstances and although I had fallen head over heels in love with my husband, I wasn't going to jeopardize the friendship we had developed. After admitting how much I love him, and when I didn't get a reply, I hemmed and hawed thinking that I had just ended our friendship. So to cover up my snafu, I immediately uttered these words: "Don't mind what I just said. It's okay if you don't have feelings for me. I just don't want to loose our friendship." (yeah I know, but what can I say? I was young and ... well young back then) It was then that I first heard these words "But I want you to demand of me." My immediate reaction was "Huh?" and then that glimmer of hope, that maybe, he may just love me to. Well he did and we did, so there.
Keith has been and will always be the kindest, most loving, most generous, most understanding, and most patient man I know. He's not a saint. Most of the time I find myself protecting those who offends God and His Name from his righteous wrath . But a more gentle man you wouldn't find anywhere else.
And, for the record, he does not take priority in my life. That's God's place. But
God has used Keith, primarily, to lead me to Him and also to embody His love for me. Not only is Keith Christ-like in his forgiveness of my idiosyncrasies and shortcomings but God uses him on a daily basis to show me just how much God loves me. God's love, through Keith, wiped away every tear I've ever shed and healed all my aches and pains and made my heart whole again. In the simplest of ways, Keith is my gift from God.
And so, ten years later, it's my turn to give those words back to him. Babe, I want you to demand of me. I need you to know that next to my relationship with the Lord, you are the one thing that matters most. In the busyness that we find ourselves in, I forget that you are my primary ministry in this life so I need you to demand of me. I fell in love with you ten years ago and ten years later I love you still from the depths of my soul.
Thank you God for my gift.
Keith has been and will always be the kindest, most loving, most generous, most understanding, and most patient man I know. He's not a saint. Most of the time I find myself protecting those who offends God and His Name from his righteous wrath . But a more gentle man you wouldn't find anywhere else.
And, for the record, he does not take priority in my life. That's God's place. But
God has used Keith, primarily, to lead me to Him and also to embody His love for me. Not only is Keith Christ-like in his forgiveness of my idiosyncrasies and shortcomings but God uses him on a daily basis to show me just how much God loves me. God's love, through Keith, wiped away every tear I've ever shed and healed all my aches and pains and made my heart whole again. In the simplest of ways, Keith is my gift from God.
And so, ten years later, it's my turn to give those words back to him. Babe, I want you to demand of me. I need you to know that next to my relationship with the Lord, you are the one thing that matters most. In the busyness that we find ourselves in, I forget that you are my primary ministry in this life so I need you to demand of me. I fell in love with you ten years ago and ten years later I love you still from the depths of my soul.
Thank you God for my gift.
Mission Field
Back in 2004 I received an email from a high school classmate in the Philippines who now lives in Virginia. The email was an invitation to a class reunion in Irvine, CA that summer. A group of about 10 ladies from SMC class of 1983, all over North America, was going to get together and reminisce about the good old days.
My initial reaction to the invitation was "Oh no!" and "Not in this lifetime!" I didn't have "good days" back in high school. I wasn't outgoing or popular or even well-liked. When the powers that be at Webster coined the term "wallflower", they had me in mind. They just couldn't find a picture of me to publish next to it to illustrate the description. When asked who among the characters of "The Breakfast Club" I related to, I reply, without hesitation, "Ally Sheedy". That was how deep, dark, desolate and joyless high school was for me.
So, upon receipt of this invitation, I ranted and raved like the madwoman that I am. I paced back in forth in my kitchen reciting this litany of excuses as to why I could not and will not attend this get-together. My beloved husband listened to my rantings and ravings, nodded his head and very calmly said: "Think of this as your mission fields." Those words literally stopped me and my pacing mid-stride. Once again, God used Keith and in His wisdom opened up this new world to me to reach out to and spread the Gospel. Needless to say, I went, spent the weekend with the ladies in Irvine and well, the rest is His story. (yes, I know -- so sue me!)
In the last four years, everyone in this group has been made aware of my relationship with God. Some know of my experiences overseas in places I can't write about. God blessed me with two sisters-in-Christ, both of which have become my accountability partners in my walk. God has also blessed me with another mentor and discipler and although we're worlds apart, considering Australia is on the other side of the planet, we have this common ground where we always meet and fellowship. And there are those, whom I've recently told, that are aware of the new ministry that God has put before Keith and I. God has put me in a position where my witness and my walk with Him has lifted up some, rebuked some, comforted some and gave hope to most. God used my willingness, albeit reluctant, to take that first step four years ago for good.
Four years later, I am now preparing, with excitement, joy and glee, to leave for the Philippines to attend my 25th year high school reunion-homecoming. For the next two weeks, I am going to be living in a world 25 years removed from my current lifestyle. This world, that I couldn't and wouldn't get involved in four years ago, has now become a part of my mission field just as much as those distant lands are. This world of 250 beautiful, talented and loving women is the soil that God has put before me to plant the seeds of His Gospel.
I have come to the understanding that as far as mission fields are concerned, whether it's in our backyards, the groups of people we move in or the ends of the earth, the most important factors involve our obedience to His word and our faithfulness to carry out the work He has put before us. It is our duty to plant the seeds and spread the Gospel, it is up to God to grow and choose His people.
Now go and find your field and start sowing.
My initial reaction to the invitation was "Oh no!" and "Not in this lifetime!" I didn't have "good days" back in high school. I wasn't outgoing or popular or even well-liked. When the powers that be at Webster coined the term "wallflower", they had me in mind. They just couldn't find a picture of me to publish next to it to illustrate the description. When asked who among the characters of "The Breakfast Club" I related to, I reply, without hesitation, "Ally Sheedy". That was how deep, dark, desolate and joyless high school was for me.
So, upon receipt of this invitation, I ranted and raved like the madwoman that I am. I paced back in forth in my kitchen reciting this litany of excuses as to why I could not and will not attend this get-together. My beloved husband listened to my rantings and ravings, nodded his head and very calmly said: "Think of this as your mission fields." Those words literally stopped me and my pacing mid-stride. Once again, God used Keith and in His wisdom opened up this new world to me to reach out to and spread the Gospel. Needless to say, I went, spent the weekend with the ladies in Irvine and well, the rest is His story. (yes, I know -- so sue me!)
In the last four years, everyone in this group has been made aware of my relationship with God. Some know of my experiences overseas in places I can't write about. God blessed me with two sisters-in-Christ, both of which have become my accountability partners in my walk. God has also blessed me with another mentor and discipler and although we're worlds apart, considering Australia is on the other side of the planet, we have this common ground where we always meet and fellowship. And there are those, whom I've recently told, that are aware of the new ministry that God has put before Keith and I. God has put me in a position where my witness and my walk with Him has lifted up some, rebuked some, comforted some and gave hope to most. God used my willingness, albeit reluctant, to take that first step four years ago for good.
Four years later, I am now preparing, with excitement, joy and glee, to leave for the Philippines to attend my 25th year high school reunion-homecoming. For the next two weeks, I am going to be living in a world 25 years removed from my current lifestyle. This world, that I couldn't and wouldn't get involved in four years ago, has now become a part of my mission field just as much as those distant lands are. This world of 250 beautiful, talented and loving women is the soil that God has put before me to plant the seeds of His Gospel.
I have come to the understanding that as far as mission fields are concerned, whether it's in our backyards, the groups of people we move in or the ends of the earth, the most important factors involve our obedience to His word and our faithfulness to carry out the work He has put before us. It is our duty to plant the seeds and spread the Gospel, it is up to God to grow and choose His people.
Now go and find your field and start sowing.
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